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Front Cover 1
Copyright 5
Table of Contents 6
Foreword: The Case Against Literature 8
Introduction: Why Can’t Canada Read? 10
The Worst of Us 13
Lindsey 18
Natural Selection 22
Crazy Glue 35
Camp Zombie 37
What Sara Tells Me 46
L-O-V-E 47
The Southwest Rapist 50
One Kiss on the Mouth in Mombasa 57
Another Young Lust Story 60
Gynecomastia 61
Nine Ball Tourney, Lotza Prizes 66
Some Kind of Betrayal 67
Little Wite Squirel Angel 69
Superboy 74
Randal Isaac’s Suicide 75
Scarlatina! 80
Rabbit in the Trap 83
The Jesus 85
Too Much Mean Me 89
The Napoleon Difference 91
Check Mate 95
Giraffes and Everything 98
Last Winter Here 105
Into Collapses 109
Four Stories 112
Amsterdam at Midnight 115
Beaverland 122
Summer 129
Retard 131
Things I Don’t Remember 135
Parade 138
Flame Retarded 140
Rats, Homosex, Saunas, and Simon 145
Yes Man 148
Parking Her Car in Michigan Theatre 153
Panties 155
Hands Held at Religious Angles 160
Sickness 162
Dandruff 169
My Lips Are Sealed 172
The Sweet Taste of Slavery 178
Band Names 179
Small Game Hunter 187
Some of This Is True 198
(Never) Fade Away 206
Some Dead Guys 209
Contributors 210
Acknowledgments 218
About Broken Pencil 219
Back Cover 220

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